The Weekly Roundup: Better late than never

Campus Reform Reporter

  • The headlines we were tempted to run, and the commentary we couldn't
  • Saturday 9 July

    Poll: Even minorities oppose affirmative action

    "It’s almost as though actions have consequences."   

    That’s not surprising. It’s rather demeaning to be infantilized.

    Monday 11 July

    Oregon bias team to get taste of own medicine

    If the BRT is allowed to continue after this review is complete…

    Aww, who are we kidding? It won’t be allowed to continue.

    Prof finds pro-BLM message in Shakespeare play

    We at Campus Reform applaud this stunning and brave analogy. In fact, we admire Professor Bezio’s ability to read between the lines so much, we have a proposal for another social justice Shakespeare interpretation.

    Considering the pernicious interference and rivalries of cousins Benvolio and Tybalt in the love life of Romeo and Juliet, we recognize that this famous Shakespeare play argues the superiority of the nuclear family. It is only within the cryptic confines of the forest that the protagonists of A Midsummer Night’s Dream are seduced and bewitched; therefore, the play makes a strong case for deforestation. And don’t forget the avarice and authoritarian paranoia with which Shakespeare labels what are now our good socialist friends in Denmark.

    ...Do you want to go down this route, Bezio? Because we can totally go down this route, and you will not like where it leads.

    Vandy distances itself from black prof’s criticisms of BLM

    TOM is the secret weapon of censorious SJWs. TOM is very effective at eliciting apologies, retractions, you name it. TOM is a natural expert at making grown men and women of prestigious institutions quake in their boots with a few clicks and keystrokes, for TOM is Twitter Outrage Machine.

    Wharton students, faculty repudiate Trump in open letter

    Their letter did more harm to the school’s reputation than anything Trump could have said.

    Cornell prof: Only whites who hate capitalism are BLM allies

    Good. The first step is admitting you have a problem.

    Harvard study: campus scandals devastate enrollment

    It’s almost as though actions have consequences.

    Tuesday 12 July

    VIDEO: Young voters don’t need indictment to distrust Hillary

    Surely she’ll be able to regain their trust by making assorted references to “the Pokémans.”

    Yale employee arrested for destroying Calhoun window

    Isn’t it victim-blaming to say the window was asking for it?

    Professors slug it out on Capitol Hill over religious liberty

    You should have seen it: there was tweed flying everywhere.

    Univ. of Iowa faculty encourage students to set pronouns online

    Maybe they should start by getting the professors’ to learn the students’ names first.

    Harvard study: No racial differences in police shootings

    With the release of this second, sensible study by Harvard, can we all just sit back and admire the rays of Enlightenment which the nation’s most prestigious university has cast upon us this week?

    Monday, we learned that violating students’ Constitutional rights results in students not wanting to attend your university. Tuesday, we learned that the boys in blue aren’t agents of institutionalized white supremacy. Maybe tomorrow, we’ll learn that progressives are bloviating buffoons.

    Wednesday 13 July

    BOOK REVIEW: Passing on the right: Conservative professors in the progressive university

    Imagine that. The conservatives are the ones who are actually interested in doing their jobs, while the liberals would rather spend their time exposing and ostracizing the conservatives among them.

    It’s almost as if the liberals became professors just because they couldn’t bear the thought of leaving college after graduation.

    VA takes direction from sex assault victims, empowers universities

    The merging of imparters of fact and authoritarian busybodies into a paradoxical conglomerate sure is a fascinating sight.

    The real question is whether the new law requiring faculty to treat 18 to 22-year-olds like kids whom people are legally obliged to protect also actually raises the age at which adulthood of said kids is obtained.

    Penn State students preach social justice to DC high schoolers

    One mystifying element of the social justice cancer is its bizarre ability to thoroughly indoctrinate its hosts while keeping them alive...apart from intellectually, of course.

    With luck, soon there will be many more #SocJus advocates like this 14-year-old slam poet, who recently performed inspiring self-flagellation to the tune of “White Boy Privilege.”

    Saying ‘all lives matter’ lands student gov exec in hot water

    No, they haven’t boiled her alive.

    Yet.

    Union members get pass from new EMU sex assault policy

    Gee, who ever heard of a union getting special treatment in Michigan?

    USC implements ‘LGBTQ peer mentoring program’

    What, they’re not going to hire a personal psychological counselor for each student? Fascists.

    Black Student Association tweets ‘blue lives don’t matter’

    A hashtag as simplistic as #BlackLivesMatter is bound to be abused, and has been before, with much better taste. But turning it around on cops the day before the Dallas police shootings? Yeah. We’re fairly certain this is what you call “bad timing.”

    Thursday 14 July

    Social justice this year’s hot topic for summer reading assignments

    Of course it is. Because schools are supposed to teach students what to think, not how to think, right? Or is it the other way around….?

    They’re doing them a favor, of sorts, though. Could you imagine how embarrassed they would be if they showed up on the first day and didn’t know about cultural appropriation?

    Books, newspapers deemed ‘privilege’ at academic conference

    The introduction to the 41-step privilege exercise states “this exercise has been designed to bring a group to certain conclusions regarding the concept of privilege and disadvantage (emphasis added).” Campus Reform appreciates the accuracy of this description, but would have suggested, for even greater precision, revising it to state: “this exercise has been designed with confirmation bias because the designer is a shameless charlatan.”

    NY colleges shun Duke over NC bathroom bill

    Blue Devils fans must be devastated that they won’t be able to see the formidable squads that surely would have been fielded by Albany and Marist.

    Friday 15 July

    Texas Tech Young Cons fire back at Student Dems

    What were the Student Democrats thinking when they decided not just to defend a blatantly racist tweet, but to actually demand an apology of the people who brought it to light?

    If the tweet was so defensible, then what was wrong with calling attention to it?

    CSU refuses to revise ‘frustrating’ writing test

    Campus Reform was advised to write a five-paragraph argument for the essay component of the SAT...in 25 minutes. Campus Reform is not a math major, but believes that 25 minutes is much less time than the 90 minutes this student was allotted.

    Ole Miss Chancellor under fire for mourning Dallas attack

    Well, at least progressives aren’t hypocrites. It would be egregiously hypocritical, for instance, if the people who said that this administrator should inclusively express condolences for both police officers and slain blacks were the same ones who harangued the inclusive #AllLivesMatter.

    Michigan prof takes stand against ‘no boys allowed’ study lounge

    They’re converting it to a lactation room, and those horrible sexists will probably still insist that men not go in there.

    UH President: free speech trumps political correctness

    Stay tuned for our coverage of the protests demanding her resignation.

    Berkeley cop watchdog suggests ‘sensitivity training’ for officers

    Because clearly the problem with police interactions is that the cops just aren’t nice enough.

    POLL: Johnson, Undecided gain on Trump, Clinton

    It’s small wonder that more people are starting to consider Undecided, insofar as he may well be the most qualified candidate.





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