The Weekly Roundup: Because 2016 can only get so much odder
- The headlines we were tempted to run, and the commentary we couldn’t.
Monday 21 November
It’s for the greater good. Trust us.
Did they confuse Plymouth Rock with the Dome of the Rock?
“I don’t know what ‘sanctuary’ means,” said the president.
Ladies and gents, the tolerant left.
“Don’t do anything drastic like riot or make up hate crimes.”
They’ve made trolling too easy. Sad!
Tuesday 22 November
The virtue-signaling is strong with this one.
We heard they collectively agreed to title their guide “How to Maintain Your Echo Chamber for Four Days Out in the Real World.”
Wait, isn’t that what the classes are supposed to have been doing?
Wednesday 23 November
And they don’t mean getting sick from your aunt’s green bean casserole.
They’re all going to be concentrated in one place, away from the general public? We feel safer already.
We don’t know which is scarier; their lack of respect for election results, or their insistence that “pussy grabs back.”
Well, 2016 doesn’t have much time left to get any stranger.
Thursday 24 November
There’s not really any other way to be thankful for the last eight years, frankly.