The Weekly Roundup: Demand for outrage revives manufacturing

Campus Reform Reporter

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  • The headlines we were tempted to run, and the commentary we couldn’t.
  • Sunday 19 March

    Even MORE ‘Jewish privilege’ posters appear at UIC

    "It's always racism, unless it's against Jews. Then it's social justice."   

    They may die the river green for St. Patrick’s Day in Chicago, but it isn’t a very attractive color on the city’s college students.

    Monday 20 March

    Profs advised to avoid 'microinequities' in class

    Hmm. They might need to do a better job of defining them first.

    Maybe they need to dig even further—what's the next smallest modifier after “micro?”

    University pays $41,500 for abbreviated racism lecture

    Nope, it wasn’t given by Bill Clinton on the subject of “superpredators.” Guess again.

    NJ asks universities to 'serve as safe zones' for illegals

    They mean that rhetorically, of course. There’s nothing tangible they can actually do.

    Safe space organizer doesn’t ‘feel safe’ describing event

    [See headline for joke—ed.]

    CA Dem proposes free abortion pills at public universities

    Planned Parenthood—so necessary, it can be replaced by a handful of abortifacient pills!

    SLU hosts female-only salary negotiation workshop

    Males, it seems, emerge from the womb with an aggressive salary request in mind.

    Women are exactly the same as men and need no special treatment or advantages, right up until the point they do. When is that point? Whenever it becomes politically convenient for feminists.

    Prof. who called Trump's election 'act of terrorism' honored

    However will next year’s recipient top her feat of making OCC an international embarrassment?

    The way things are going, we half-expect the first prof who calls for Trump’s assassination to be given a ticker-tape parade by the school.

    Student assaults basketball player for wearing hair braids

    If that’s going to be her cause, she’s got her work cut out for her.

    Tuesday 21 March

    USC boosts 'emergency fund' for immigrant students to $20K

    Not that they voted on the extra $9,000 or anything, though…

    $20,000 in a budget like this isn't an emergency fund, that's a line-item.

    Student gov prez pressured to resign over anti-Semitic tweets

    To be fair, there weren’t quite “dozens” of them.

    It's always racism, unless it's against Jews. Then it's social justice.

    Profs taunt conservative student in faculty-wide email chain

    Their bitter tears were the perfect complement to the savory taste of victory.

    Wednesday 22 March

    Prof excuses black student from lecture on slavery and race

    Every ellipsis in the prof’s message is another point at which liberal guilt was impeded, just for a moment, by common sense.

    Wellesley profs want control over speaker invitations

    Who else will protect students’ delicate little ears?

    'VietPong' beer pong team too 'insensitive' for UPenn frats

    First of all: this wasn’t racial; it was political.

    Second: It was rather funny.

    Next: “grammar Nazis” becomes verboten.

    College requests 'grammatically incorrect' gender-neutral language

    Admitting you have a problem is the first step.

    Muslim students demand prayer space, religious advisor

    We find it hard to believe that Columbia University is the only place that Muslims can go in New York City to pray.

    Thursday 23 March

    Conservative Middlebury students kill anti-free speech bill

    Ironically, it probably would have passed without even drawing notice if not for the violent excesses of liberal students.

    Student creates database to report profs for microaggressions

    What kind of monster would ask a student to complete assignments on time even when the student is feeling a little sad?

    College ‘diversity council’ posts FAKE racist flyers

    If one is what one eats, then they must serve a lot of crow in the cafeteria, because these kids were absolutely convinced that the straw man was real.

    Columbia socialists 'demand' chance to condemn Charles Murray

    They’re fine with free speech, as long as theirs is the speech that’s free, and everyone else agrees to sit quietly and listen.

    Rice drops 'master' title to promote 'inclusive environment'

    That’s gonna put a real damper on the school’s graduate degree offerings.

    Socialists plan protest, walkout at Charles Murray speech

    Ah, but “planning” and “doing” are two entirely different beasts.

    'Black people can't be racist,' students tell 'white people'

    Good thing they made that clear, because otherwise we would have thought that the rest of their signs were extremely racist.

    Friday 24 March

    CA Dems propose free tuition funded by tax on millionaires

    Florida and Texas were both thrilled at the news.

    California education appears to have skipped covering “the goose that laid the golden egg.”

    Threatening graffiti targets OCC College Republicans leader

    Oops, sorry. We meant to say, “targets OCC.” The graffiti may have threatened Recalde-Martinez by name, but it was the school’s property that it was painted on, you see.

    Napolitano fears Trump will ‘isolate and antagonize’ Mexico

    Think Trump can get the border wall built before the end of her trip?

    Law profs condemn excesses of ‘safe space’ proponents

    Mind you, these guys are supporters of safe spaces. They just can’t stand the embarrassment of their rhetorical allies any longer.

    Prof accepts award after damning Trump’s win as ‘terrorism’

    She won’t speak at commencement, though. She’s probably just afraid that someone might record it.



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