Clemson student ridicules 'simple minded' agriculture majors
- Clemson University Agriculture majors are up in arms after a classmate penned a pseudo-satirical article calling them “simple minded,” misogynistic, and bigoted.
- The article mocks ag majors for being "aggressively heterosexual" and having southern accents, and also calls them out for being both pro-gun and pro-life.
A Clemson University student incensed many of her peers with an "exaggerated" article calling Agriculture majors “simple minded,” misogynistic, and bigoted.
In an article for the college-oriented humor website The Black Sheep, titled “Let’s All Just Agree That Agriculture Is The Worst Major At Clemson,” Clemson student Kelsey Costa provides five reasons for her thesis, all based on generalizations about students who major in Agriculture.
After alleging that “AGR guys” routinely lounge about with their bare feet resting on tabletops and “talk loudly in quiet places,” for instance, she complains that ag majors are “aggressively heterosexual,” saying, “They walk with a gait that screams, ‘I have a penis and I will put it in anything that resembles a vagina because I don’t believe gender and sex are different things, even if it that thing is the gas tank to a tractor.’”
Costa goes on to attack the “simple minded ag folks” for hunting and fishing, calling them “those guys who say they’re pro-life but then don’t want to do anything about gun control because they love killing innocent animals with machine guns for sport.”
Returning to her theme of the supposed stupidity of ag majors, she portrays them as caveman-esque figures because of their southern accents.
“Southern accents aren’t bad, but when you’re completely surrounded by people who turn one-syllable words into two-syllable words, you start to question all laws of grammar and syntax,” she writes. “Suddenly everyone is just grunting and slamming cans of Keystone on the ground for communication, and we’re back to square one.”
Finally, she takes issue with their attire, mocking them for wearing shirts that say, “It’s an agriculture thing, you wouldn’t understand.”
“The people who are most eager to tell others what their major is are the ones in the major on which the university was originally founded,” she scoffs. “They want everyone to know that they are majoring in something that’s nearly 150 years old without being scolded for focusing on history.”
The article does appear to be somewhat satirical, with a concluding statement clarifying that the publication does not “hate” agriculture majors, but does consider Costa’s descriptions of them to be generally accurate.
“Here at The Black Sheep, we tend to exaggerate our feelings about certain subject,” the footnote states. “So do we hate agriculture majors? No. But are the characteristics listed totally accurate for the majority of them? Yes. So we win. Triggered? Go listen to our GIRLS ONLY podcast!”
Some Clemson agriculture majors were not amused, however, including Seth Roddey, an Agricultural Mechanization and Business major who responded to the article with an open letter.
“Normally, I’m not one to be offended. And I’m definitely not the type to be up in arms about something negatively spoken,” the article begins. “However, today is different. Today, I read an article about how Ag majors are loud, unclean, aggressively heterosexual, lazy, and just downright unintelligent.”
“Apparently, we’re aggressively heterosexual and willing to fornicate with ‘anything that resembles a vagina…even if that thing is a gas tank to a tractor,’” Roddey continues, noting, “That’s a pretty serious accusation, and one that’s extremely outlandish. I hope it’s just satire, but if you truly believe it, I pity you.”
He also pointed out that “we don’t hunt with ‘machine guns’ and claiming otherwise is just ignorant,” adding that “it is ridiculous to compare the issue of abortion to that of hunting animals.”
Roddey elaborated that Costa’s article “has created and shows a divide in the student body at Clemson, even though many of [her] articles mention building the Clemson family and being inclusive to everyone,” signing the letter, “Your Loud, Barefoot, and Simple Minded Ag Major.”
“I hope it's just satirical, but after reading her other articles I found that she pushes a political agenda,” Roddey told Campus Reform.
“I took the time to read most of Kelsey's other articles, and I found that she preaches inclusiveness of the Clemson family,” he elaborated, saying, “she also takes any chance she gets to call white males racist, privileged, or supremacist.”
In another Black Sheep article, for instance, Costa wrote, “Did you know that many Clemson students are white guys who ask for sex via Yik Yak and own at least 3 Confederate flags handed down to them by their fathers? Not to mention the campus is prone to epidemics of KKK recruitment flyers. But, you know, ‘heritage.’”
“If you disagree with any of what we have stated above, then you’re probably one of the ignorant many that attend this university,” the article continued. “Everyone needs their privilege checked every now and again, and what better way to do that than through song.”
Kenly Derrick, an Agricultural Education student at nearby Tri County Technical College, also expressed displeasure with Costa’s article, viewing it as an attack on everyone in the field.
“I am completely disgusted on the lack of knowledge put into this poorly written article and the derogatory, slanderous language used towards not only Clemson as a university, but their Agriculture students and professors,” Derrick told Campus Reform.
Campus Reform reached out to Costa, but did not receive a response in time for publication.
Follow the author of this article on Twitter: @rMitchellGunter