The Weekly Roundup (1/25/16-1/29/16)

Monday, 25 January

National event being planned to protest campus censorship

Of course, most of the students who try to participate will probably be censored...

Mizzou prof involved in protests charged with assault, but will keep her job

She called for muscle. They called for her job.

UCSB plans to coddle students with ‘MICRO-AFFIRMING spaces’ workshop

If micro-affirmations are anything like microaggressions, though, don’t expect it to have much of an impact on anyone.

Duke grad student equates defending free speech to white supremacy

What he really meant, though, is that he knows that popular support for free speech will always trump sympathy for hurt feelings, which vexes him greatly.

Tuesday, 26 January

UC Irvine students compare campus police to ‘slave patrols,’ demand they be eliminated

It’s all well and good that they want a “safe space,” but giving lawbreakers free reign on campus seems more likely to produce the opposite effect.

USC student group to host ‘Consent Carnival’

No word yet on whether copies of the book Getting To Yes will be distributed.

Professor recognizes Mizzou administrators as ‘enablers’, ‘cowards’

Which is a bit like a soldier in the U.S. 7th Cavalry Regiment questioning Custer’s judgment, if you think about it.

Texas university chancellors warn faculty not to violate campus carry law

Not that it is likely to do any good, considering that the instructions are as toothless as the law itself when it comes to enforcement.

Arkansas law prof says school cleared him of racial bias charges to avoid judicial rebuke

Kind of like a recalcitrant playmate agreeing to share with you when his mother is walking down the hall.

Wednesday, 27 January

Students nation-wide to attend four-day, university-funded white privilege bash

It could only get whiter if it were held inside a Whole Foods in Vermont.

USC ‘Consent Carnival’ to feature kissing booth, trivia games

In case you’ve ever wondered how to relate a bouncy castle obstacle course to sex.

Amherst College Trustees vote to dump ‘racist’ Lord Jeff mascot

Despite conceding that complaints about the unofficial mascot were utterly groundless, the Trustees decided ol’ Jeff was simply more trouble than he was worth. Got a good reason for taking the easy way out?

UCSB theater troupe promotes performance with public paeans to ‘pussy’

One might even say they put it on a pedestal.

Harvard prof, former Dem presidential candidate puts hope in Trump

Alright, but even if one agrees with Lessig that campaign finance reform is the most important political issue of the day, would it really happen during a Trump presidency?

Mizzou ‘muscle’ prof suspended following assault charges

Well, at least now she won’t have to worry about teaching from home to avoid opprobrium.

Thursday, 28 January

Nursing students being taught white privilege, police brutality at Ohio State

How could they possibly be expected to provide quality health care without knowing that red flowers refuse to share their special soil?

Former Mizzou president says he resigned to prevent Ferguson-like race riots

And yet it is still an open question whether the destruction would have cost more than the school expects to lose from reduced enrollment.

KU Senate declines to impeach executives who didn’t ‘stand in solidarity’ with BLM

It’s nice to know that calisthenics will not become part of the job description for student government leaders, but we have to give most of the credit to those calling for impeachment, who sacrificed most of their credibility when they deemed a children’s cancer charity fundraiser a “microaggression.”

U. of Iowa art exhibit features racist cartoons, lynching photo

Fear not: we are assured there will be a massive trigger warning at the entrance to the exhibit.

Mandatory Mizzou diversity training talks Katy Perry, South Park, taco costumes

The main takeaway? Be as offensive as you want, as long as the target is disliked by liberals.

Washington U paper wants to know if students prefer ‘face-sitting’ or ‘69’

We’ll have to wait two weeks to learn the answer, but we already know where Monty Python stands on the question.

Friday, 29 January

USC ‘Consent Carnival’ features bounce house sex simulation

“It was like you were having sex with the bouncy house…”

Missouri legislature considers mandatory free speech courses for all college students

Ah, but how would they find anyone qualified to teach the courses?

U. Mass engineering students get credit for building ‘LGBTQA-themed electronic light displays’

Wouldn’t that just be stage lighting?

UT Dean urges faculty, students to fight bill ‘that will effectively wipe out our diversity efforts’

Yep, that’s pretty much the point…

Mizzou prof. avoids jail time with community service deal

She called for muscle. They called for her job.